How often have you found yourself thinking or saying the following?
"I wish I had more time for myself."
"I'm so busy! I don't have a moment to breathe."
"I need more hours in the day."
" I don't have time for that."
We all lead crazy, busy lives. And the one thing we never seem to have time for is ourselves. This problem seems to get even more pervasive as we work harder to meet the challenges of this new economy and try and please everyone around us.
Most people put more personal time on the top of the list of goals that they want to accomplish. With work time, spouse or family time, and social time all demanding our attention, we are constantly juggling our day-to-day responsibilities. Finding as little as 15-30 minutes a day of uninterrupted relaxing "me" time is challenging at best.
But we all instinctively know that when we take time for ourselves to pursue our passions, do the things that we enjoy, relax or even do nothing at all, we end up happier, healthier, and feeling better. "Me" time allows us to de-stress, unwind, and rejuvenate. Taking time for yourself allows you to renew, heal, and create reserves of energy and peace.
When you talk to others about planning "me" time in their schedules, three common themes arise: not enough time. feeling guilty, or it feels selfish. I have found these same excuses within myself. It seems the more giving and caring a person you are, the more these feelings seem to emerge.
Remember that no matter what we do, there are only 24 hours in a day, so you can't create more time. But you can clear some time by reevaluating priorities, perhaps saying "no" more often and practicing smart time management.
"Me" time is not something you should feel guilty about. It's nothing more than taking some time to put aside your everyday business and treating yourself to an activity that you enjoy. If gives you an opportunity to relax, refocus, and recharge. And when you do that, you can come back to your responsibilities with greater focus, commitment, and enjoyment.
Most of us become so involved in giving to others that we fail to give to ourselves. And although this is more often a trait in women, there are plenty of men out there who feel this way as well. Many are so caught up in earning a living to take care of their families, that breaking away from responsibilities to indulge in hobbies, reading, or hanging out with the guys makes them feel selfish.
If everyone else around you is worthy of care and attention, then so are you. You not only deserve this time, but you need it for your own well-being. Lack of time for ourselves often leads to feeling frustrated, tired, overwhelmed and out of balance. Without this time for ourselves, we lose sight of what's most important to us.
Let's look at some ways you can make "me" time a reality:
First, decide that you deserve some time to yourself each day. Stop feeling guilty for taking time out for you, and realize in the long run, it's a win-win for everyone. When you are tired, stressed out and pulled in too many directions, it is hard to give your best to all you must accomplish. Remember, self-time is not selfish--it's a necessary dimension of self-care!
Decide how best to spend "me" time. How we choose to spend free time is as individualized as we all are. If you had an extra 15 minutes, a half hour, an afternoon or an entire day, what would you do to make yourself feel rejuvenated, relaxed and happy? Maybe make a list of things you would like to do during those times and keep it handy when you begin scheduling time into your calendar.
Learn to say "no". Yes that word is "NO". Say no to requests to do things that you don't really want to, don't value or don't bring you satisfaction and joy. I know from experience we all want to be people pleasers, but we have to say no every now and then.
Ask for help! Ask your spouse for help with things around the house that don't necessarily have to be completed by you alone. This is a great opportunity to give your children chores around the house and earn a little money for things they have been wanting.
Commit to a minimum of 15-20 minutes of "me" time everyday. Do something (or nothing) that completely lets go of responsibilities and releases your mind, allowing you to be alone with your thoughts. At the end of each work day, when I get home I take 15-20 minutes by myself no interruptions. I use this time to download from the days work and to relax so I can be ready to tackle the rest of the evening.
Create a daily ritual. This can be anything from a bath, listening to music, taking a walk or just having a quiet time to yourself. Make it something you can look forward to. By creating a daily ritual of "me" time you look forward to this time and find that you enjoy it more.
Stop wishing you had more time to yourself, and commit to carving it into your daily routine. Rather than make up excuses for your lack of time, change your approach and create the time. You will be amazed at how a little bit of time to yourself can make a big difference in your health and happiness!
With Love,
"B"
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